Walking away from an offer will never be easy, but it’s important to know when to do it-and powerful to be able to say “no.”
Have you been at your job for a year? Have you taken on new responsibilities since you’ve been hired? Have you been exceeding expectations (rather than just meeting them)? The answer to all of these should be “yes.”
Turns out, timing is everything. Most people wait until performance review season to ask for a salary adjustment, but by that time, your boss has probably already .
Instead? “Start talking to your boss about getting a raise three to four months in advance,” writer and former human resources professional Suzanne Lucas of told LearnVest. “That’s when they decide the budget.”
Prepare a “brag sheet,” recommends Kathleen O’Malley of Babble. “It’s a one-page summary that shows exactly how awesome you are as an employee. List any accomplishments, awards disabled dating sites, and customer or co-worker testimonials (“You saved me when you did XYZ!” emails definitely count as testimonials!) you’ve received since your last review. You want to demonstrate your value to your boss.”
Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse. Write down what you want to say, and practice to a mirror, on video, or with a friend until you’re super comfortable having the conversation.
We tend to start off the week more hard-nosed and even disagreeable, but become more flexible and accommodating as the week wears on. “Thursdays and Fridays find us most open to negotiation and compromise because we want to finish our work before the week is out,” reports Psychology Today.
Before you go into the negotiation, try Amy Cuddy’s tip of doing a “power pose”-in other words, going into the bathroom and standing tall with your hands on your hips, your chin and chest raised proud, and your feet firm on the ground. Doing so raises testosterone, which influences confidence and reduces the stress hormone cortisol.
A study by the European Journal of Social Psychology found that caffeine made people more resistant to persuasion-meaning you’ll have an easier time holding your ground during the negotiation.
“The way you enter a room can dictate how the rest of an interaction will be,” says James Clear. “Ever see someone slump through a doorway with a scowl on their face? Not very inspiring. Keep your head high and smile when you enter. Starting things off with a positive vibe is very important, no matter how small it is.”
You should start the negotiation conversation by asking diagnostic questions to understand more about the other party’s true needs, desires, fears, preferences, and priorities. Professor Leigh Thompson at the Kellogg School of Business at Northwestern University says that 93% of all negotiators fail to ask these “diagnostic questions” in circumstances where getting them answered would significantly improve the outcome of negotiations.
Asking questions like, “What are your biggest priorities right now?” can help you understand where your negotiation partner is coming from-and offer up solutions that will help.
Remember that brag sheet? Now’s your chance to walk through your accomplishments with your manager. If possible, print a copy for your manager to look at while you summarize what you’ve achieved this year. You’ll want to specifically highlight times when you’ve gone above and beyond in your role, which will build the case that you deserve a raise. Then, be prepared with a few thoughts on what you’re excited to take on going forward-whether that’s freeing up some of your manager’s bandwidth by taking on an existing project, or proposing a new idea that you’re excited to own.